November 26, 2020

A letter from God

My children,

We need to talk. As you know, I am very busy with things like preventing Earth from crashing into the sun, managing time and space, and on top of all that, listening to your grievances on a day in which I would rather be watching football. Having to work on my day off isn’t a big deal, but here’s the thing that I’m kind of tired of: people killing other people in My Name. Let’s be real; I’m a laid-back kind of God. So, when I heard there were all kinds of my followers getting upset about a poorly-created online movie trailer about Muhammad, I was confused for a few reasons.
First, I was confused why so many people think it is all right to kill other people for the sake of morality. Let’s get one thing clear here: there are things that are right and there are things that are wrong. Killing people is wrong. To kill someone in a fit of ethical outrage is like becoming a prostitute to raise money for chastity awareness. Sure, making fun of someone’s personal beliefs regarding religion is tasteless, but murder is a sin regardless of what the religion is of the murderer or the victim.
Second, I was confused why so many of you were angry about the video that you may not have even seen. The protests occurred in very poor countries like Algeria, Yemen and Libya. Interestingly enough, only two percent of the total population of Yemen have access to the Internet. Only about six percent of Libyans have access to the Internet.
What is even more perplexing is why you would take your frustrations out on a group of people that had nothing to do with the movie in the first place. The film was in no way, shape or form in affiliation with the United States government. It was as if someone had broken your car window and when you found it in the parking lot, in retaliation, you attacked the closest person to you. If you want to protest anyone, it should be untalented racist filmmakers, but I don’t think Mel Gibson would appreciate another group of people hating him.
Either way, I am a very peaceful entity. My very existence is the definition of compassion, joy and most of all, love. When you commit an act of violence against one of My children, you commit an act of violence against Me. You know that thing I said about loving your neighbor? I meant it. Treat others as you would like to be treated, unless you want someone to kill you. In that case, seek help. The right to live is the most sacred gift I have bestowed upon humanity. Please don’t take that right away from someone else because he or she sink sto a level of hatred and bigotry. So in conclusion, don’t be hatin’ just because they be hatin’. Just because someone else is ignorant doesn’t give you the right to be. It only gives them reason to believe their preconceived judgments are correct.

Sincerely,

God

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