December 17, 2018

How to deal with your family this holiday season

Most of us are preparing for the most wonderful time of the year. I can already smell the honeybaked ham that’s sitting on the kitchen table Christmas day. There’s Christmas music playing in the background, and the tree is lit as bright as ever. The air is full of laughter and holiday spirit. And then, Uncle Jeff gets political and ruins everything.

There’s nothing more dreadful than spending this holiday season hearing your family argue about the state of America and the migrant caravan. I think we can all picture in our heads ‘that’ family member. That guy or gal that drinks four too many Busch Lights and puts everyone in fight or flight mode in a split second.

Let’s not let Uncle Jeff ruin the Christmas spirit. Here’s a couple tips on how to deal with that horrible, awful family member this holiday season.

First and foremost, do not play to their rules. These types of family members are ticking time bombs, waiting for someone to say something that they can run a full marathon with. Remember, Uncle Jeff is already four Busch Lights too deep. His beer breath will take anything it can get and run with it. If you give them a field to play on, you’re already down 0-1.

One way you can do this is by avoiding them. It might be hard if you’re in a small house, but it can be done. If you have to, just don’t make eye contact with them. Then they don’t have a reason to start the fire.

Second, don’t say anything that could be controversial, even in the slightest sense. The second you say something that can be contested, they are in your face like Lebron James. Uncle Jeff, who lives by himself and is “between jobs”, is the self-proclaimed smartest guy in the room and loves to let people know they’re wrong, which is you when you bring up that controversial argument.

Get the personal conversations over with right when you walk in the door. Yes, I’m still in college. No, I’m not getting married anytime soon. No, I’m not having kids until I’m 30 so stop asking. If you get it done first, the rest of your night with the family will be less stressful.

Lastly, don’t get too competitive if you play games with your family. Just try to have a good time, even if you notice Jeff cheating in the corner like he always does. If you cross the line and get too into it, everything will become more tense and your average family Christmas will go downhill really fast. Forget about the game and just get through the night without any black eyes.

Once you’ve read all these tips and reviewed them before your family outing, you should be well prepared for the long night you have ahead with all your family members and, of course, Uncle Jeff. Just put on your invisible earbuds and let the family be because there is no stopping them from being, well, them.

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